Five! He's Five? Already?

This week I will become the mother of a five year old boy. How did this happen? It seems like just yesterday my teeny tiny preemie entered our lives. All 2 pounds  and 12 ounces of him came screaming into the world and he hasn't stopped talking, moving or exploring the world since then. Its been a wild ride so far with never a dull moment and the excitement just keeps on coming.

I remember the day we brought Sidney home from the hospital. Despite being 11 weeks old at the time, he was still a tiny peanut. After weeks upon weeks of assisting in his care in the NICU he was finally all ours. As I stared at him lying in his crib I was overwhelmed by love and fear. I loved this little boy with every inch of my being but I was scared since I didn't know anything about babies. Until Sidney was born I had never changed a diaper, I couldn't decipher whether his cries meant he was hungry, needed a dry diaper or he just wanted attention. And most of all, he was a boy. I knew nothing about raising a boy!

But what a whirlwind raising this boy has been. Sidney's moved three times, living in three different countries and is currently learning his third language. In the past five years he's visited more countries and acquired more frequent flyer miles than most people do in a lifetime. He has friends from every just about every European country, can recognize most of their native tongues and can identify most of the flags of the NATO countries. He is the first to welcome the new kid in his class (which in a military community means there is always a new kid in the class), is quick to give his mom hugs when he senses I am sad and has a stubborn streak that rivals my own. On the playground he is just as apt to be playing Star Wars as he is to be pretending he is a butterfly or a ninja. He loves books, playing football (a.k.a. soccer), never encountered a body of water that wasn't perfect for stone throwing and has never met a stick that wasn't worthy of being picked up and saved. And as of late, is obsessed with toy soldiers. I blame it on our trip to Normandy but since then he talks non-stop (in both French and English) about soldiers, specific World War II battles, and when prodded can even recite facts about General Patton.

And it was this love of all things army (not Navy of course because we are a Navy family but perhaps this is his own form of rebellion), that I found myself covered in green and brown buttercream frosting this past weekend. For a variety of reasons we had never thrown Sidney a birthday party and from the moment we arrived in Belgium last winter he has been planning his 5th birthday party. It was to be at the bowling alley on base (because every base has a bowling alley and having a party there is a right of passage for every military brat), with pizza and cake and all of his friends. A few months ago camouflage was added to the requirements. That meant camouflage invitations and goodie bags as well as cups, napkins and plates. Even the candles were camouflage. And instead of creating a light and airy cake I found myself frosting cupcakes and a cake with dark green and brown frosting and adding toy soldiers to the decorations for good measure. And much to my delight Sidney loved it all. He loved his multi-national classmates who attended the party (by my count seven countries were represented), the bowling, the pizza and cake and yes, all of the toy soldiers he received. As he declared to one classmate, this was the best birthday ever. And that is all that matters.

I still have no idea how to raise a boy but we're learning together. Like I said, there is never a dull moment.

Happy birthday little soldier! Whether you join the Army or the Navy, become a linguist, a doctor or a street performer, your mom will always love you.

The Calm Before The Storm

I feel like I'm sitting on the cusp of a storm where once I take the next step there will be no going back.  What storm you ask?  The birthday-holiday-moving one.  Sidney's birthday is next week.  Yes, my little baby will turn four two days before Thanksgiving.  He's informed me that at three he is still little but when he turns four he will be a big boy.  And as such, he has some very firm ideas about his cake; chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting of course topped with whipped cream and chocolate syrup.  Before that he wants to eat bacon and waffles for breakfast then hot dogs and macaroni and cheese for dinner.  (This is not my idea of a culinary good time but he is the birthday boy after all and I told him he could eat whatever he wants).  More importantly, if the weather holds Glenn and I have a very special surprise for our airplane loving boy this weekend.  Yes, I'm stooping to something I had always told myself I wouldn't do and we are celebrating his birthday two days early because it is just easier.  To some people that might make me a bad mom but I'm just trying to be practical and make sure he gets the birthday he wants and deserves.  So if that means it is celebrated early, so be it.  

 

And that is because right on the heels of his birthday comes the annual American food festival called Thanksgiving.  For me, it is the single biggest cooking and food day of the year and it takes time to prepare.  As usual, we're hosting a dinner for friends.  And although our guest list is small (just 8 compared to the 24 of recent years), in a week that is already filled with other non-negotiable commitments, my cooking and preparation time is limited. Somehow even with fewer guests the number of dishes I have planned has increased.  I'm not sure when it will all be cooked but it will.  Because like Sidney's birthday, it has to be done.

 

Once Thanksgiving is behind us December is upon us with her requisite decorating and rounds of holiday parties and dinners at which we will be both guests and hosts.  Gifts need to be selected, purchased and wrapped and another round (or two) of cooking will ensue.  Oh, and did I mention this little thing called an international move that will be taking place in January?  Yes, we need to prepare for that one too.

 

So today I'm stepping back and taking a deep breath to prepare myself for the storm that is to come.  T.G.I.F.  Because once Saturday hits there will be no turning back.  

Forty & Fabulous

Even Google is helping me celebrate..kind of creepy but
who would have imagined this 40 years ago.

The day that has been 40 years in the making has finally arrived.  After watching numerous friends celebrate their milestone birthdays over the past few months, it is now my turn to turn the big 4-0.  Even as recently as a few years ago I had dreaded this impending milestone; so much so that when I hit 32 I decided that that number was a good one to keep and each year I kept telling myself that I was 32 (again). Even my husband got into the action by annually giving me a birthday card verifying this number.  But within the past couple of years, my mindset has slowly changed and now that this once dreaded birthday is here, I'm realizing it isn't so bad. After all, age is really relative and like a fine wine, I'm just getting better with each passing year.

A few weeks ago Huffington Post blogger Amy Wruble posted a rather humorous take on 40 things about turning 40.  I ignored the article the first few times it popped up on my Facebook page but after the sixth posting I clicked on the link to see what had so many of my friends Facebook sharing.  The top forty on turning forty provided a humorous take on life issues ranging from purchasing one's first pair of reading glasses and selecting the comfortable shoes over the sexy ones to upgrading the quality of skin creams you use and the lack of current pop culture knowledge many of us now have. (You can find Wruble's entire post here and read all forty of her points for yourself).  I'll admit that I've purchased at least one, if not more, of the afore mentioned items myself in recent months and am so far out of the "what is popular" loop that I've just given up trying, so these comments hit rather close to home.   As I continued down the list I found myself agreeing in some way with much of what was written but rather than getting upset with and bemoaning the realities of turning 40, I mentally embraced them.

And here is why: I didn't care much for my 20's since I spent that decade trying to find myself professionally and personally and achieving neither great results nor satisfaction along the way. (I often wonder about people who look back on their 20's and wish they could live them all over again. Maybe they were just luckier than I was but personally, I wouldn't want a replay that time period for all of the tea in China).  My 30's were much better with each and every one of my "32nd years" being an improvement over the last and it has been in the past few years that I feel as though I've finally hit my stride.  I now know who I am and am comfortable with it.  I'm far from perfect but I know both my strengths and weaknesses and rather than dwell on my faults I'm learning to embrace them all.  I'll never be tall or skinny nor will I be rich or famous.  I'm not going to be a career super star nor am a I going to be president.  And that is o.k.  I'll never have so many friends I can't keep track of them but those that I do have will always be special and important to me.  Over time I've learned which battles are worth fighting and which ones it is just smarter to walk away from.  I realize now that it is more important that I am true to who I am and what I believe in than it is to be popular.  I've learned to bite my tongue when necessary and turn the other cheek if doing so is for the good of the group.  I'll never win a mother-of-the-year award but I also don't think I'm imparting too many lasting scars on my son.  It is doubtful that I will write the great American novel, become a world famous chef, travel to all of the countries in the world or visit all of the national parks in the United States (all dreams at one time or another) but I will make it a point to visit the places I really want to see, continue to cook up good family dinners, and blog from my little corner of the universe.  And I am happy with all of this. If someone had told me ten years ago that I would feel this way about so many things, I would have laughed but today I understand this to be true.  And this is my more mature, 40 year old reality.

My real birthday celebration was a girl's trip to Spain last month (another benefit of being older is also having the funds to do the things I enjoy doing) so today will be quiet and low-key.  Thanks to Facebook I've received birthday greetings from friends around the globe and I even received a special birthday message on my Google search screen.  (I find this to be a bit creepy but that is a conversation for another day).  This afternoon I had lunch and laughs with great friends and tonight will be dinner with my boys.  And that is just the way I want it. After all, being older and wiser I realize that being all flashy and splashy just isn't my style.  Been there, done that, tried it, and it just didn't work out.  All that pomp can be saved for the "young-uns" because I like things just the way they are.  So bring on the 40s................they are looking to be fabulous.